Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Chemo, phase II -- wish me luck

Tomorrow I begin phase two of chemotherapy, taking the drug Taxotere. I've just finished Adriamycin and Cytoxan which are supposed to be the worst part...however some women report that the taxanes (Taxotere, Taxol and Abraxane) are actually harder to deal with. Who knows?

I am probably more afraid of this regimen than the former because of the possibility of permanent neuropathy -- particularly in my hands. I fancy myself a writer, after all, and I need my fingers to to be agile enough for typing on a keyboard. The thought that after all of this I can't return to a normal life doing what I love....well, that hardly seems fair to say the least. But then again, none of this is fair.

Forgive the pity party, but it seems each leg of this breast cancer journey has had some huge hurdle, some unexpected turn of events. Major skin necrosis after reconstruction, an SVT after port placement and the worst nausea I've ever experienced after my first round of chemo -- despite all the assurances that the anti-nausea drugs work wonders. So is it any wonder I'm expecting the worst case scenario? As my oncologist says, I've been pretty beat up lately.

So...I am filled with dread, I don't mind telling you. But I'm forging ahead despite it. Okay, not exactly forging...more like limping ahead weakly.

Wish me luck (and you can call me Bitch, too, if you wanna)

13 comments:

Alison said...

Aw Kayleigh, I do hope this next round is easier on you. You are an amazing woman. I do have to say that I think the cytoxan was harder on my pup than the other chemo drugs he had to endure. Take care and I wish you the best.

Lesa said...

DEAR KAYLEIGH,

All I can say to you is that I believe in the power of prayer, and I am praying for you everyday.

I am a complete stranger and NO I don't know how you feel, but I care.

much love, Lesa

Sheila said...

I hope this round is easier on you, Kayleigh! I think of you often, and how much of a punch to the gut this year has been for you.

I think the Powers That Be owe you - buy a lottery ticket!

Thank you for keeping us updated, hon. As always, good vibes to the best bitch around. ;-)

Hug,
Sheila

Brenda said...

I thought the A&C were much worse, but then, I had them second as a part of a clinical trial. I did end up with neuropathy, but that too seems to be passing. For sure the nausea was not as bad with Taxol.

But then you do have the cumulative effect.

The good news is that it will end. You will get through this.

Hang in there . . .

PamelaTrounstine said...

YOU CAN DO IT BABE!

Compression stockings can preemptively help with foot neuropathy, can the 20-30mm ones they make for hands/wrists help for you?

Anonymous said...

You are a bitch (for luck) and you can and will get through this too. Kick cancer in the azz. You are freakin' wonder woman!

Best of luck to you Kayleigh.

Jean said...

Yo to ma bitch!

You are a warrior, you will beat this thing, and we will all be cheering from the sidelines.

Thinking of you x

Teri said...

If anyone is allowed an occasional pity party it is you! I hope it goes well and the sickness is to a minimum! You're in my thoughts!

T

Daria said...

Cancer sucks ... so does chemo. Wish there was an easier way to fight this disease.

Wishing you all the best.

La Belette Rouge said...

You will kick cancer's ass. Really, I have so much faith in you. With your attitude and spirit, there is nothing you can't do.
Thank you, sweet lady, for your VERY kind comment on my blog. It means more to me than I can say.
HUGE hugs to you!
xoxo

The Small Fabric Of My Life said...

Be strong - you have come so far and so bravely. You are in my prayers.

Anonymous said...

All the way up in Alaska...you have an admiring reader praying for you. You WILL survive. You are an inspiration. Thank you for sharing your journey with us. You are helping so many more women in so many more ways than you will ever know. Blessings to you and yours.

With love, FarNorthGirl

Nishant said...

you will beat this thing, and we will all be cheering from the sidelines.

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